Tuesday, June 23, 2009

No, You May Not Frost My Cupcake

It's discussion time again and this week I'm posing a question about friendships, the relationships between men and women and what is appropriate and what is not. It's up to you. Read the issue, discuss in the comments and offer up your opinion.

You are sitting at your friends house and her husband makes a comment along the lines of, "I'd like to frost your cupcake..." or the classic "I'd like a (insert your name and your friends name) sandwich. Heh heh. (Insert a comment about how he might be into polygamy too)". It's not the first time he says things like this but because you don't want to embarrass your friend you smile and brush it off. She laughs it off each time as well. However, it just keeps happening.

What do you do? Do you continue to keep quiet for the sake of your friend? Do you take him aside later and confront the man? Or do you reprimand him for his behavior right there in front of his kids and wife?

Have at it!


  1. tough one. Can you hit him?

    Aren't you so glad you aren't married to him? Sheesh.

  2. Well, it's not me. It's a lot of other women I know. He won't even talk to me. I wonder if I scare him. Heh.

  3. I would most likely brush it off at first but after a while if it kept happening and it really bothered me I would probably make a very snide comment like in front of him and his wife in a very snide way so that they get my point. If it kept happening after that then I would probably begin to distance myself from that couple due to the feeling of discomfort that I got around that individual.

  4. Wow - my last 3 best friends have been women and I wouldn't have EVER been comfortable joking about that kind of thing even with them. I love innuendos and rude jokes, and lord knows I say some inappropriate stuff, but some things are way out of bounds.

    If you were to confront him, he'd claim he's joking, but I don't think he is. Generally, guys won't keep saying that kind of thing to a woman if there isn't at least a hint of truth behind it. Now if he were talking to a guy friend that would be different, but directly to the woman...I don't think so.

  5. I'd probably whip out a "duuuuuuuuude, not appropriate!" and leave it at that.

  6. Yuck! I'd hope that I'd say something directly to both of them. More likely I'd be very uncomfortable and start avoiding situations where he was going to be around.

  7. Maybe they're uh.. BOTH looking for a reaction? To see if it's an interest? If you catch my drift??

    I would be just plain ol' blunt about it. Short and sweet and to the point: "I don't want to offend you, but it really makes me uncomfortable when you talk like that." (Sweet smile)

    Creepy though.

  8. Ok, that is super creepy and I'd definitely call him out on it. Aren't you glad you scare him and don't have to deal with that?


Thanks for commenting! It's always good to hear from a reader and not say, a robot.