Friday, September 04, 2009

I'm Getting All Schmaltzy About My Friends

Along with all the other things you are thinking about this month- heading back to school, stocking up on the latest fall fashions, closing down that summer house (heh), you can now add in that September is NATIONAL FEMALE FRIENDSHIP MONTH.

According to a 2009 University of Michigan study women with close female friends have lower levels of the stress hormone cortisol. I fully agree with this statement because I know it isn't just the wine on girls night that makes me relaxed. It is the sharing of our week's stories, the cackling laughter, encouragement and support that we give each other weekly that keeps me going and it is better than any magic pill in a bottle.

I feel truly blessed to have as many friends in my life as I do. It is a lot of work to keep some of those contacts going through the years, miles and sometimes tribulations but the ones who have stayed in my life make my moments, days and years. They say you have friends for seasons and reasons. I believe that too. It has been studied that women's friendships can fall off during their thirties when careers and life really ramp up. If you can maintain your friendships throughout that busy time then the relationship will most likely last for the rest of the individuals lives. That is pretty amazing.

E and I are a perfect example. We have been friends for thirty years now. She is the sister I never had. On the exterior we could not be more different. She tans like a mofo and I burn unless the tan comes in a bottle. I'm taller and blond. She's petite with glossy dark hair. As kids we fought often, our differences seemed glaring, but then something clicked when we hit junior high and despite being in separate school systems we banded together and became life lines to each other. Sometimes I think she knows more about me than my parents or H.

When I had a series of massive panic attacks right before my wedding it was E that I wanted to hug me. I know, I wanted a hug. Even as a ripped through my parents luggage for my father's stash of xanax I knew that just having her by my side would be enough. She wasn't going to try and make me laugh or take my mind off my nerves. Her presence was enough.

When I was 'in the shit' that was my sophomore year of college tearing up bathrooms, burning things, sobbing at random times and an all around hot mess, she would sit on the phone for hours listening to my woes ($300 plus phone bills!) from her study abroad program in Ecuador.

In big and small instances she has been by my side through the good (SATC marathons, high school dances, college visits and happy hours), the bad, the ugly (high school dances, junior high haircuts, and lime green skeggings) pet deaths and more. I only hope I've been able to be there for her like that too.

In honor of National Friendship Month, it's time to check your friendship inventory. Call that girlfriend in Texas you keep thinking about, the friend who just lost her job or just the one next door. Keep those friendships going. They keep you strong both in body, mind and heart.

Leave a comment about one of your friends and why you love them and it will automatically enter you into my Mummy's Product Review giveaway. I'm giving away five copies of the CD/DVD of Michael Buble Meets Madison Square Garden this week. Good luck!


  1. Anonymous7:24 PM

    You are and have been my best friend since we were two. From being witches and talking with invisible people to "not participating in group activities", to effing Red Rover, to bike riding at the beach, to being grounded from each other, to chicken fingers every Friday, to cappuccino at The Hilton, to "Vicky and Erika Live!", to looking at the moon from our dorms freshman year of college, to all the times I've leaned on you (I won't name them, you know there have been many :)) - I love you like a sister and miss you all the time! Drew has only met you once, but comments occasionally that I need some Vicky time!

  2. Anonymous7:24 PM

    P.S. I'm having a Girl's night tonight, and so wish you were here!

  3. Such a nice post!

    I have a friend that I hold very dearly that I met in 7th grade. I moved away a couple of times and though we always kept in touch, we drifted out of each others' daily lives. When she had a baby in college, we reconnected, and I was fortunate enough to be named his godmother, something that is very special to me as I love that little boy with all my heart and soul. She helped me through a broken engagement, laughed through my dating woes, and celebrated the love I found in Mircea. As a Marine wife she's been all over the planet, but I'm lucky enough that she's at Quantico now so I get to spend some time with her and watch her son grow up.

    Ok, I put a pretty long post on your comment section-but I'll be sure to send it to her too!

  4. Treasure that bond. Every single stinking day I wish I had my own "E".


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