Overheards- Clowns

Scene:  TD and I are out for a walk, just the two of us.  We pass by a house with the front door open so she can see inside their foyer.  A two foot high clown dressed in a green and gold lame costume is standing like a sentry in the corner.

TD:  OOOhhh, look at that clown.  I love that clown. I want that clown in our house.

V:  I don't know about that. I don't really like clowns. 

TD:  You don't like clowns?! (This cannot be!  How can someone not like clowns?)

V:  No, they creep me out. Clowns scare me.

TD:  They scare you? Why?

V: I don't know. They just do.  Some people just don't like clowns. (I shudder as I think of all the scary clowns from my life- the red, white and blue one that hung in my nursery as a child.  I can still recall it as I peered out at it from behind crib bars.  IT.  Poltergiest.  Need I go on?)

TD:  Is it because they break into your house at night and crawl in through the windows and climb on your bed and dance on you yelling, "BOO!" (She does a little jig like a freaky leprachaun as she says all this.)

V: (I glance down at her with disbelief and a bit of frightened awe) Um... yeah, something like that.

I swear this kid has peered inside my nightmares.  I can't decide what is more frightening. 

And congratulations to Kristen on her new baby girl!  What an amazing birth story!!

Not in My House

Never. Queen of Spain says it best in her post here. Creepy. Just creepy.

Would you want any of these dolls in your house?

I didn't think so.

You thought that was weird? Check this out.

He Works for the Government. He can't be Fired.

A funny thing happened to me on the way home the other day. Cue drum. Ba dum bum.
I was in the Charlotte airport waiting to board my plane when a man caught my eye. Not like that! He looked familiar. Had I sat across from him in some banal meeting at Company A many months ago? Hmm... I just couldn't shake this feeling.

I boarded the plane and there he was sitting right next to me. Fate? Now I never strike up conversations with strange men but I was just couldn't let go of the idea of how familiar this guy looked to me so I spoke up. Turns out the guy lives in my neighborhood and we have probably seen each other around town. Nothing big. Then he threw out there that he used to work for the Department of Defense.

"Me too." I replied.
"Oh well I worked in the Hoffman Building." He answered, as if I wouldn't know it.
"Wow. So did I!"
"I worked in the wage department you probably..." I interrupted him right there. "SO DID I!"

The year I was born this man took the job that I would later have as my first job out of college. He started out with the same people who would later be the higher ups when I got there. We worked with many of the same people. Including my evil boss. The man who punished me (yes,really), made other women cry daily and basically caused so much grief I left after 11 months and filed a sexual harassment report. That job while it had some great moments (loads of travel with other early twenty-somethings)was a nightmare. It spoiled me for a long time. I was so warped on what a boss should be like and how you should conduct yourself in an office it was awful. He would ask us to wear low-cut shirts and short skirts. He would punish us with no work and keep us from office get togethers and travel just because we denied him entry into our hotel rooms. He was a monster.

I relayed this briefly to this man I didn't know on a crowded plane and you know what? He understood. He had to deal with it too. He dealt with the women in his office for years suffering under this jackass. He eventually left partially due to this same man. The coincidence of it all was just so bizarre. After more conversation it was relayed to me that old boss-man isn't faring so well. He is in fact dying. This is quite sad. It is sad in the sense that a human being is suffering and so is the family around him that loves him. He has children who love him. Can I deny that the idea of 'you reap what you sow' crossed my mind? No I cannot. It flashed like a neon sign in my brain for quite some time. Is that wrong?

For years this man emotionally and mentally mind-f*cked women. He berated them and made them feel as low as dog sh*t on the bottom of one's shoe. Lower even. Countless people left their jobs at this office because of this man. But as H said last night, "He can't be fired, he works for the government." It's true. When I filed my complaint he had 23 years in and all he got was a slap on the wrist. A tap really. When I filed about seven other women came forward that very same day and that was all he got. A verbal reprimand. Nothing more.

It's all water under the bridge now. I marveled at what a small world it is on meeting this man who looked familiar but I am simply amazed at the coincidence we share and the sameness of our situation. It makes me sad that a government such as ours, an office that modern, could employ and keep such a Cretan for so long. How powerless we all felt in that situation as women. Young women.

Today I fight the urge to feel a sense of righteousness over the outcome of it all. Now he officially cannot return to work. It's like a comedic tragedy playing out right in front of me.




* On a much lighter note see this great review for Effie's Heart. Kimo's clothing is to die-for. I am in love with the red coat! Also, I'll be a guest on Motherhood Uncensored's radio show tonight at 9 p.m. with featured guest, author Ann Dunnewold, of Even June Cleaver Would Forget the Juice Box. An amazingly helpful book folks so check us out tonight.

Creepy Man Freaks Local Mom While Shopping

News at 11.

Well, not really. Here it is though. While trying to avoid/not get sucked into the 13th Ring of Hell that is my local Safeway, I decided to make a trip to a different grocery yesterday. It's where I do all my "big" shopping since Safeway seems to think its quite alright to take half the GNP from my wallet each time I visit. Seriously I sometimes think I'm funding some small nation with the amount of money I spend there.

While perusing the goods, and incredibly rotten strawberries I might add, this older gentleman approached my cart. "Helloooo", he muttered a bit lasciviously. Ick. I breezed past not making eye contact and barely said a small 'hi' back. He turned around as I whizzed by and said, "I said HELLO!" Ok. Thanks. Creepy. I say Creepy because it wasn't just a friendly thing, there was definitely a dark, ominous feel all of it. He looked at me like I might end up in his crawl space later and he liked that. I seem to attract this type of behavior. I ignore it but the freaks come out when I do. Hmmm... does that mean I'm a freak too? Don't answer that.

As I finished up our shopping and checked out at the register I noticed him hovering. He was behind me in line about two people back. Holding nothing. WTF? No cart. No basket. Nothing in his hands. Not even a pack of gum. I'm not one of those 'excuse it away' girls either. This man wasn't buying a pack of Marlboro's. He kept mumbling at me too. Now incredibly creeped out I skedaddled myself out of there right quick. Only to have him nab me at the door. There he was less than 8 inches from me asking if I needed help to my car. Seriously? Dude was not an employee. I told him, "No, I'm fine." He asked again adding the, "Are you sure you can handle it?" Yup! Yes, I can handle the toddler in an animal cracker induced coma and my cart chocked full of environment killing plastic bags (forgot the cloth ones!) on both racks of the cart just fine thank you. NOW BACK OFF!

He followed me out of the store fora a ways all the while mumbling. I suppose I could have looped back into the store to complain, but I honestly didn't think about it at the time. My only thoughts were "Get away from me Creep!" and "Stupid plastic bags! Hate you!"

Later that night I told H about the whole incident. Normally not much phases H. When I tell him about things like men making comments to me or groping (eons ago I swear and it was usually in a bar) he doesn't do that customary riled up thing. Sometimes this perturbs me but now I'm just used to it. Last night though he made the requisite shocked face and seemed truly disturbed that some weirdo is following his wife and kid around the local grocery emporium. But it's not as if he can do anything at this point so we moved on to watching some banal show on television.

What would any of you have done in this creepy situation?