Pffft... Who needs sleep?!

We don't need a new baby to give us sleepless nights. Nope. We have T.D. a.k.a. the Sleep Torturer. Just like her name, the Tiny Dictator, she has blossomed into a czar who makes sleeping four hours in a row seem like bliss.

For example:

I pass out at 7:30 p.m. last night. Lucky me. Sleep when baby sleeps right? Except baby is two and not napping in the afternoon and throwing a Goebbels-sized fit about going to bed. Somehow though the pregnancy hormones make it impossible for me to stay up any longer. I wake up two more times before 9 p.m. and officially turning in.

11:13 p.m.- The dictator arises. She is dissatisfied with her bumble bee blanket. How dare we try to provide extra warmth with such an inferior blanket. Rather than kick if off herself she just wails until we take it off.

I shuffle back to bed.

12 a.m.- Crying again. I open the door to her room and find she is A-OK. It's just a drill apparently. Kick ass.

I shuffle back to bed and trip over a dog bone.

2:32 a.m.- Screams can be heard from across the hall. T.D. is wet and highly pissed. No pun intended.

H stumbles back to bed after changing her.

We slumber for three blissful, uninterrupted hours until....

5:47 a.m.- Terror grips me as it sounds like a wild animal has attacked my child. Actually it is just thirst. She wants milk. At 5:47 a.m. I oblige if it will buy me more sleep.

6:42 a.m.- Awake again. The milk untouched, no diaper change needed the dictator is severely displeased with the book and toy selection in her room. Music is not acceptable either. I want to slam my head into something hard enough to deem me unconscious and therefore unable to deal with any of this. A pounding headache is beginning as is a cold. H snuffles in bed with the dog who both sound like a cold is imminent for them as well.

I lay in bed pleading for silence when at last it occurs until...

7:15



Today is the first of my birthday festivities and while I'm excited I just hope I can stay awake. Especially after having to take a meeting today and then driving everyone around tonight. I'm exhausted just thinking about it all.