Does the Media Pressure You to be Hot?

Yesterday I slathered on sunless tanner (ahem, review purposes). I even dressed up a bit. OK, so I basically picked out a button-down shirt and ironed it, but I totally did my hair and make-up and wore cute shoes.  Even accessories.  For just me.  It's like I'm back despite my three inch roots.  I'm trying to hold on to who I was before I got pregnant this third time, because I swear this third pregnancy really wants to see me in sweats, worn out yoga pants and a ratty t-shirt on a daily basis.  It really likes it when I use Pssst on my hair versus real, lathering shampoo.  In fact, all week I've been making the extra effort so that my outsides don't reflect how tired and bedraggled I feel on the inside. 

When I read the Sacramento Bee's article, "Regular Moms Under Pressure to be Hot Too".  I got annoyed.  Sure, I understand where all of it is coming from- the media, Hollywood, whatever.  Except I don't feel external pressure to be "hot".  I want to keep myself looking young, healthy and fit in mind and body simply for myself, my husband and my kids.  I don't want to look back years from now and be able to pinpoint the time when I just let it all go, got out of shape and stopped taking care of myself.   I feel my mind would turn to rot at that point too.  President Who?  You get the idea.  This doesn't come from the media or Hollywood.  It comes from self-preservation and a  need to stay sane. Exercising and taking the time to take care of myself does all that.  I'm like the Army. I want to be all I can be.  It is within my modest means to keep up with trends to a degree and update my wardrobe.  My husband does this for work so why shouldn't I?  Even if my only job was caring for the kids I still can't imagine just not caring.  UNLESS.  Unless I didn't care about any of this stuff even before I had kids.

This idea that the media, Hollywood and more is pressuring us Moms to look sexy, be MILF's (gross) and be hot is for the insecure.  The people who buy into this are not doing it for healthy reasons but because they are lacking in other areas of their life.  If they can't open a magazine without feeling the need to look like a Kardashian then there is something incredibly wrong and it isn't the media that is at fault.  They need to look within themselves. 

Thankfully, there are women out there who have the confidence to write books like The Mominatrix who share the healthy ideas about the importance of creating and maintaining a good body image and self-confidence.  That doesn't happen because you have a full time nanny, chef, stylist, unlimited bank account and personal trainer.  It happens because you want it, need it and decide to be yourself and own it as part of a whole that makes up you.  What the magazines say is only what is trendy.  The onus, the pressure applied comes from within ourselves.  We are the ones who make it healthy or unhealthy. 

No more excuses.  No more blaming others. 

Confessions of a Cheater

I just might be a sloth.  My motivation and will to work out has completely left me.  While my butt aches from sitting on the couch so much, it is about all I can do most of the time these days.  Yes, my friends things have changed.  Do you hear the hoof beats of the horsemen of the Apocalypse too?  I just can't seem to get back on track.

I have not indulged in any alcohol at all this month, I am, along with others, 18 days into this No Sugar/Alcohol Thirty Day Challenge and I am confessing to cheating on the sugar front.  Not even cheating, just downright diving in.  I had a Frosty last night from Wendy's while I watched the Golden Globes.  A delicious, smooth, creamy, frozen cup of bliss.  I needed it. OK?! Just leave me and my cold, tempting treat alone.  We love each other!  Before the Frosty there was Coke.  I don't even drink soda but lately it is like sipping heaven.  It soothes me so.  There was also an incident involving some maple syrup as well.  Kicking the sugar at this point in my life has proved harder than I originally thought.  On New Year's Eve when H and I made the proclamation I figured I would feel cleansed and powerful at this point. I would feel trim and strong.  In fact, I feel tired, soft and of the five-toed sloth variety.  I am not a good example right now.  Not. At. All. 

H, on the other hand, is a good example. The man gave up fried foods and processed foods as well as the sugar and alcohol.  He stuck with it too until this past Sunday when my need to get us out of the house propelled us into a local eatery and he succumbed to a chicken parm sandwich, a coke and fries.  For shame!  Not really. His skin is glowing!  He looks fit, healthy and svelte.  Eliminating all that sugar and fat from his diet has proved difficult but not unrealistic. 

Me though?  You should just kick me off your happy, skinny, hard-working motivational team. OK, not really. I did create this whole challenge and I plan to get back on it.  My emotional eating must be controlled and I promise to do better for the remainder of the month. 

2010- No More Excuses

I never watch 'The Biggest Loser'.  OK, maybe sometimes I catch a weigh in or two, but I don't know the players, their stories or their fight to lose the weight while at the ranch.  Since there was absolutely nothing else on TV last night and I felt ridiculously tired, I lay there like a sacraficial lamb and allowed the show's newest season to unfold before my eyes.

And I cried.  I gasped.  My hand flew to my mouth as I watched these people struggle and I laughed as they endured the wrath of Jillian, who climbs atop treadmills to yell in your face like a tiny, wronged monkey.  At least she didn't tell them to gargle their hearts. Yet. 

It was then that I realized I was at the closing of my fifth day of self-imposed 'no sugar/no alcohol' month.  Oh.  Right. Month.  When I write it that way.... WILL.NOT.FEEL.FUTILE!

After dreaming of sugar it actually hasn't been as hard as I thought.  I resisted the birthday cake this past weekend.  I stopped putting sugar in my tea and I've eaten a bit more fruit than normal but even after a day or two of that it has stopped.  I've stopped thinking about it too.  Having fajitas last night with no beer was sad but we survived.  Tomorrow's girls night will be an even bigger test.

H, on the other hand, wanted to curse me to all eternity. His Facebook status proves it-

"Why the hell did I agree to cut out all alcohol, fried food, and processed sugar for the month of January? I think I’m going to start smoking again just to get through this. Thanks Vicky, no really, thanks Vicky."

Well, at least we are in good company.  It is January after all and people are trying to make lasting changes in their lives.  It's hard but worth it.  You can do it and it helps when you have others on the journey with you.  If someone offers to help you reach your goal, whatever it is, then you should seriously consider their offer. No matter how tired you feel, 2010 is the year of 'No More Excuses!'

And that's my two cents.