Overheards

Scene: After completing a round of Pilates yesterday morning I head to the shower. TD follows after me holding a pink ribbon.

TD: Momma, I'm doing kwaties.

Me: Kwaties? You mean pilates?

TD: No! Kwaties. Ka-wha-tieeess (speaking slowly to me as if I'm slightly special.)

Me: Kwaties, huh? That's cool.

TD: Yeah. I learned it from Mary.

Me: Mary? Who is Mary? Does she go to your school? Is she on TV?

TD: (Slightly exasperated) No, Momma. Maaarry. Mary and her purple lamb. And I have to use my belt. Like dis! (circles pink ribbon around her waist and holds it there.) See? I'm going to do Kwaties now. Bye!

Me: You are blowing my mind kid. Just blowing my mind. And freaking me out. Just a little bit.

I seriously don't want any encounters with a purple lamb in my house. Especially while sober.