Thursday, February 07, 2008

No, I can't go for that. No can do...

(Are you singing Hall & Oates now? What about now? Am I crazy for lovin' them? H says it shows my remarkably bad taste in loser music.)

Because it is day 45 (no I'm not pregnant) and I feel like I've been pmsing for the last million days (To those who live near me, I'm sorry. I don't like it either. I'm really trying to be nice, cuddly and such but my hormones are whack yo and it makes it hard to feel human-like) I'm posting things that irritate me or I just plain don't get.


1. Chit-chat in the Express line at Safeway (aka the Seventh Ring of Hell). It's the EXPRESS line people. I'm all for a friendly customer-cashier relationship and all but when the line is four and a half people deep and that half person is trying to use the conveyor belt as a place to do the moon walk, read/throw magazines and drool snot on other people's purchases can't we just HURRY IT ALONG?! Do you need to stop? Not bag groceries? Not scan items? Just chit-chat to someone who is clearly a stranger? You've bonded that fast?! It's the EXPRESS line?!

2. Getting rear-ended. We are putting this in the "irritate me" category. Lady, you cut me off and then you rear-ended me. Don't think I didn't see you reading that piece of paper either. I just forgot to tell the insurance company about that. Don't then think you can tell them I had previous damage to my bumper. Until you, the only damage to my car was on the inside inflicted by a tiny dictator which was more like a hurricane of cheerios. That and H getting late night McD's and leaking those tiny maggot-like onions covered in ketchup all over my drivers side seatbelt and seat. Seriously. Sick! I thought the cheerios were spawning bugs for a moment.

3. Two girls. One cup. Not the spoofs either. Look it up if you must. I'm not putting the link here. I don't need traffic that badly. I'm blaming E for making me wretch and gag for days afterwards. I just don't get it. Or the girls in it.

4. The cards in the back of library books. They no longer stamp them. They aren't scanned. Yet the library can't seem to quit them. So they leave them in and they are bright blood red now. Why bother library? Why? I find them all over my car now after each trip because they fall out all the time and serve no purpose but to waste more paper.

5. The appeal of Rick Salomon. Don't get it. The dude looks like a poster-boy for venereal diseases. He was married to Shannen Doherty. Now Pam Anderson. Starlets flock to him and he's always wearing that stupid ski hat. Does the clap make you cold? Does anyone call it the clap anymore?


I don't get the appeal of the Olson twins either. They haven't done anything but slouch in years but they are still somehow 'relevant'?

Share what irritates you today! It's a free for all over here! Don't get something? Put it in the comments. It's all about sharing today. Plus I need to be entertained.

Here's some bloggy love too while I'm at it. I can't be curmudgeonly all the time now can I? Stimeyland is getting the love today because through her I turned The Mummy Chornicles into this. I always wanted a Ninja Cat on the site! That and I should have named my kid this. Rambo indeed. I mean she did shoot her blanky after all.

P.S. H? Are you hearing this? Your daughter totally rocked out to Hall & Oates this morning.. bwahhahaa!

5 comments:

  1. Anonymous10:25 AM

    Great! Thanks for putting that image back in my head!! I have officially started gagging again thank you very much! Yeah, I looked it up, thanks to "the Best Week Ever" showing me videos of people watching that video and watching their responses. It got me curious and "had" to see what people were freaking over. It was WICKED disgusting and I don't get it either. Y? Y would someone even do that? I think that has to be the grossest thing on the internet ever!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm annoyed by two things:
    1.) We packed out of CA and moved to VA three weeks ago and no one can tell us where our shipment containing our winter clothes is.

    2.) People actually think Barack Obama is an Islamic fundamentalist:
    http://wonkette.com/353615/brave-newspaper-press-operator-will-stop-muslim-fundamentalist-barack-obama

    ReplyDelete
  3. That drives me nuts!! I love when people trot out- Obama's grandmother's last name was Hussein..... cue ominous music. Whatever. It's like Smith. It's a common last name.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous11:22 AM

    OK, today the really, really loud talker in my office (who holds all phone conversations AT TOP VOLUME) had a completely inappropriate 30-minute screaming fit while on the phone with Verizon Customer Service. He actually told (actually, screamed at) the person on the phone to "shut up" and repeatedly yelled "I WANT TO TALK TO YOUR SUPERVISOR! I WANT TO TALK TO YOUR SUPERVISOR!" until someone in a nearby office shut his office door. It was completely obnoxious behavior.

    p.s., on a positive note, the tea diet book arrived yesterday -- thanks!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hey, thanks for the love! Rambo is one freaky looking cat!

    As for things that irritate me? The list is so long I don't know where to start.

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for commenting! It's always good to hear from a reader and not say, a robot.