Friday, April 09, 2010

My Terrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

You put on the dress, ripping off the tags and feel brand new. Your heels click importantly as you wheel your suitcase out to the car and you breathe a sigh of relief. Aaah, I feel ready to work and professional.

Then you stop for gas before getting on the road and your GPS feels cranky. It clearly isn't feeling professional today and doesn't want to play either.  After twenty minutes of fiddling with it, cursing at it, downloading apps to your phone and calling your spouse you have directions.  You are now late.  The feelings of professionalism begin to recede as anxiety carves a pit into your stomach.  You glance at the clock and think, "There is still time. I'm fine." 

You coast down the highway in your new car, getting used to its feel and briefly accelerate too hard.  Realizing the errors of your ways you slow down.  Too late. A cop flashes his lights and you are pulled over. More time is sucked away and you try not to scream at him as you tell him that you just got the car last night and it's a real step up from a '98 Corolla.  Being blond, pregnant and female does nothing for you. Neither does the "I have to pee!" excuse.  He, like the GPS, doesn't feel like playing.  At least you got out of a criminal offense and just got a ticket. Cringing, heart beating fast you grip the steering wheel and head back onto the highway.  You finally make it to the city you need to be in, but not your destination.  The minutes are flying by and instead of being there an hour early you will barely be on time.  IF everything from here on out goes smoothly. 

Oh look! A sign up ahead for a toll.  Funny, I don't see a toll.  Just a parking lot and parts of downtown.  Right. That parking lot attendants booth was not a parking lot attendant booth. It was in fact the toll and you just drove right through it.  GAH!  Breathe. Just breathe. Flames will not shoot out the sides of your head or come billowing off your face.  So what that part of your paycheck will go towards fees and fines now.  At least you have a job.  Right?  Right.  If you can get there on time. 

Up ahead at the light you are ready to cross the bridge to your final destination.  WHY IN THE WORLD ARE THERE ROAD BLOCK SIGNS?!  WHY IN GOD'S NAME IS THIS HAPPENING?  You check to see if your blue dress has suddenly turned into a yellow shirt with a black zig zag pattern.  Nope. Good grief.  It's not even ten a.m.!  Pulling over you call your work and they direct you to the site.  You have made it.  You feel sweaty, nervous and totally freaked out.  What more could happen today to make this day complete?  You don't even want to know. 

Later, when the work day is complete. All you want to do is head to the hotel and get something to eat.  Here's what else can happen.  You spend an hour with a dead GPS looking for your hotel, not even finding a gas station to stop at to ask for directions.  Your phone dies half way through this ordeal.  So much for those downloaded apps.  Finally, you miraculously find the hotel.  Alone. Not a soul or restaurant in miles to be found.  You set your suitcase down, chug some water and are relieved the day is done.  Tomorrow WILL be better.  It has to be. 

1 comment:

  1. Anonymous2:20 PM

    Ugh. I've had days like that. When you just keep thinking after every hiccup, "Really?? REALLY??!!" Sometimes when I'm driving (and almost exclusively when I'm late) just as the 10mph paddy wagon makes a left as I go striaght, the lady with her walker slowly starts to hoist herself across the street....which could take days. Last week I actually hit construction was directed by one of the builders to a detour that ended in a DEAD END. WHAT?! Hope your next day was better. :)


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