To the Woman with the Fang Toothed Foul Mouthed Dog Behind Me

Hey Lady,

What's your problem? Are you always so grumpy and mean in the morning? Does the smell of parvo vaccines and Alpo make you antagonistic at that time of day? I really tried to be nice as I stood in line in front of you yesterday at the vets office. Were you mad because I got there first? I'm sorry that two months ago I scheduled an appointment before you. I really wanted to like you too because you seemed like such a sweet little old woman. Even when your under bite ridden fang toothed lap dog started growling and sneering what was surely a string of doggy obscenities at me and I tried not to laugh at his Jennifer Beale's Flashdance styled complete with the rolled up sleeves sweatshirt. Really, I tried.

Except for this. This one thing. When I politely moved away to the farthest wall with my dog and child to wait for my bill (Talk about upsetting, I think I just gave some vet's child a very nice Christmas!) to be processed and you said, "I can't wait for you and your kid to leave." I had a hard time cracking a smile. Especially when my child was quiet as a mouse and standing behind me, her back to you and fang-boy, and looking out a window. You pressed on with, "It's not your dog my sweetie is growling at, but your kid. It's almost embarrassing." ALMOST? Lady, it is embarrassing.

Still, I chuckled. Ever the polite, well-mannered Mummy I tried to laugh it off with, "Oh well, children are unpredictable with their sudden moves and excitement. I can understand that." You didn't budge you kept on making comments. You told each vet tech and passerby in the ten minute span that my kid was making Snappy Face-McUgly Dog over there on your lap just soooo upset. I'm sorry for your lack of grace and manners. I'm sorry that I then labeled you a dried up old crone in my head. I'm sorry I snickered in an unmannerly fashion when you inquired about allergy testing and special foods for that yippy thing you call a pet.

It's almost embarrassing, but I have a hard time with rude people. Now if you'll excuse me, my sweet dog that the vet techs are fawning over with my even sweeter child have to quietly leave now. I will now smile politely to you and wish you and your shivering growling mess of an animal a good day and a happy holiday season. That's just the type of lady that I am.